Posted in Writing

Unsettled

You’ve seen her tears fall, she’s let it all go
Tired of fighting for those who don’t care to fight back

It’s become the point to where when she’s gone from this world
Those who had the chance to be apart of her life will live with that regret

She doesn’t tell many that she’s dying
She doesn’t say a word to those that show no interest

Her life is ticking away and that hourglass is fast losing sand
But still she holds her head high

Even though she knows her time is coming faster than others

She’s faced with too many things she’s trying to get done
She knows she needs to prepare so many but she doesn’t have the words

She stares at the rain with a wistful feeling and a burdened heart

She doesn’t know how to push past the tears that come when no ones around
She doesn’t know how she’s keeping a smile on her face
Though she feels like a part of her is slipping away

She pushes through and keeps her eyes on the cloudy sky
Praying she’ll be like the rain

Even though she knows her time is coming faster than others

Posted in Writing

Human Sanctuary

I saw everything from the get go
I felt like I was tumbling toward
Even though we were both fighting it
You were pulling me closer
But I couldn’t understand someone like you wanting someone like me

You said you needed me
But I thought I was just a comfort, a blanket that a little kid totes around

But you were dead serious when you said I curbed your nightmares

When the demons were hot on your heels
All you asked was for me to love them too
You kept pulling me closer, holding me closer

You could slay all my demons
Shine a light through the dark
You could hold back the words of hatred and the wishes that I was never born

But when it came to your own fight, you clung to me like a little boy holding his teddy bear
You told me I was your angel, guiding you through this world
You didn’t want to let me go
I fought so hard against your hold
But you just pulled me closer
Wrapping your jacket around me
Giving me your warmth
Hypnotizing me into your love

I saw everything from the get go
I felt like I was tumbling forward
Even though we were both fighting it
You were pulling me closer
But I couldn’t understand someone like you wanting someone like me

Posted in Writing

Wicked Love Lies

He put his life on the line for our country
Lift you behind
But you couldn’t stay loyal

He expected a girl that loved him
Not betrayal as he came home
The horrors of a war killing him from the inside

But the horrors at home tore him like an animal ripping his heart out

The pain you inflicted at him would have killed a lesser man
But he was trained to withstand anything
Even though his heart was broken
The tears falling on his badge of honor
The gunfire in his ears still ringing
The long weary flight

Who the hell gave you the right to betray him
All he wanted were your arms
The love of a woman that promised love

Instead he was faced with hell

Posted in Writing

Rain Falls

Every time it pours your mind drifts to her

Every lover you take knows her name
Knows her heart before they even know her face
Something about her will never let you go
She’s the one that you’ll get to have
Just a taste and you were haunted by her flavor
She was like cherry lip balm that you never wanted to forget

Every time it rains, she weaves a spell around you

Reminding you that she belongs to another
Whispering through your anger, triggering the jealousy
Like a blood lust vampire, she pulls you to her

You can’t stand the rain because of her love of it
Every time you see it fall, you see her twirling in it
Hunger rips through you, as another rain storm comes through

Posted in Writing

Widowed World

I throw the keys down, baby it’s been another tough day
I’ve been doing this solo, trying to keep it together
Your memory keeps me sane
While this world is losing its mind

I use to be the girl that could make you smile
Now my smile doesn’t shine as much
I’ve got this world on my heels
Demanding things that I use to turn to you
Reminding me that I’m alone now
While you’re memory haunts me

Need to remember that I can’t leave my keys in the door
All these things that I took for granted

How your laughter once followed me as you took my keys out of the door
How you use to know what to find to help me get ready
Now I need to do this all by myself

Your memory haunts me as I have to remember to circle widow instead of married

 

 

Posted in Writing

Walking Nightmare

I see you in my dreams

I’m torn as my heart gets ripped out every night

I awake every morning and go to you

I find my spirit empty as I cry

I wanted you for the rest of my life

But my head got in the way

I could never take back what I said

You’ll never know

You’ll never get to see

What you meant to me

The night before they found your body

You confessed your love to me and when you asked what I thought

I ran away from you, now, now you’ll never know

When the rain falls, I cry to the night

It tears from my heart, screaming the 3 words I should have said 

Three words you’ll never hear in this waking nightmare I carved out for myself

Posted in Writing

Another headline

Come on boy

They’re watching us again

Front row seats

Seeing what we’re going to do

We were suppose to be a one night stand

But then we couldn’t get enough of each other

They’re watching us

Seeing what we do

Another girl giving me a dirty look

Another day of us being on the front of every gossip column

Another day of us against them

These games they’re all trying to play

The fun of friends wanting to break us up

Another soap opera, another fight, get your popcorn ready

We’re in every headline

We won’t be old news until next week

We’ve got bets going on behind our backs

We’ve got their attention even though we don’t want any of it

Come on baby, let’s show them

We’re the entertainment tonight

The main attraction, come on baby, let’s prove them wrong

Posted in Writing

Failed You

You put the coverings over my mouth even though I want to cry

You never wanted me as I am

You thought I was a good kid only when I graced you with silence

You don’t agree with anything I do 

You sit there and tell me expecting me to change my ways 

When you never tried to bend your ways for me

You didn’t care to, you went and did your own thing

Even when I pleaded for you to stay with me 

My whole life I’ve only seen your back facing me, always you walking away 

Echos of my tears fell on your retreating back

Short memories of nothing 

You never wanted me as I am

Only what you wanted me to be 

Posted in Writing

Hated Birth

Sometimes watching this world crumble around me 

Makes my heart grow stronger but I feel like hope is lost

I feel like the superheroes are dead and lost

I take a deep breath and see the sun fading and darkness descends upon me 

With jaded eyes, swollen lips and black eyes I’m searching for hope in the crowd

Love is at the bar getting drunk, torn hearts cascading like a deck of cards 

I feel like this life you gave me is just a dream

As your words wash over me, you don’t want me

You wish I were never born 

How does a mother wish her child to never be born?
All my thoughts stop

You emerge from the darkness, grabbing my hand

Wrapping your arms around me

Sheltering me, covering my eyes

You brush your lips against my neck, my shoulder, drawing me in 

Away from her hatred

You remind me that you see me 

You remind me that you’ve got me as I let it all go

You pull me out and bring me back to you

Your love saves me from her hatred

You love shelters me, reminding me the reason I was born wasn’t for her

It was because you were waiting for me 
I was born for you

Posted in Writing

Heart and Head in agreeance

Friends turn their backs on you

Gossip flies past us

Trying to gain an understanding of us

Trying to get into the back door

Thinking it’ll be easy when they don’t even know what we’ve been through 

We know these games, hearts lie on the shoulder of the road

Drive away from this small town way

Your head is siding with your friends lies

Your heart is shaking her head, showing you pictures of a life that could be

He’s standing tall under the falling rain

Defending it all for you

Not asking for anything in return except you

All he wants is you, he’s showing his love 

Friends will come and go but that boy is here to stay 

Your head and heart know this, so girl why don’t you take this chance 

Love him